Hello! I'm Kristina. Writing about who I am and what I like feels difficult for me without first explaining what I have been through over the past few years...

 

Yes, I am writing this bio about myself, because I am the writer in the family. In fact, anything that you see written on our websites or on YouTube was probably done by me. Writing is a passion of mine, but it has also become a need. A little over 2 years ago now, I got a pretty severe concussion, and I have been living with the effects of post-concussion syndrome ever since. Because of my injury, my memory is not like it used to be and I often get confused and have trouble focusing. This is why my journaling & filming have become my two best friends.

 

Part of the reason we started Reising Up was not just so we could make memories, but so I would actually be able to remember the things we did. Plus, being the introvert that I am, especially post-injury, Reising Up pushes me to step out of my comfort zone, and I am now passionate about challenging myself and others to do the same.

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When I first got the concussion, I honestly thought it was going to be a short-term recovery. I never anticipated that it would last this long, or just how much it would impact my life. Living with sound & light sensitivity, vision changes, dizziness, nausea, never ending migraines, balance issues, and so much more, made normal activities feel impossible. My injury caused me to lose my job as a special needs aide, my ability to function "normally" on my own, and it made me feel like I was left sitting on the sidelines of life. I felt left behind by friends and family, and I at points I wondered if I was ever going to have a real life again, especially since many of the things I once loved and enjoyed I could no longer do.  

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After seeing minimal progress or change a year into my recovery, I came to realize that it was time to start living again. I wasn't sure what that meant, or what life now would look like, but I knew I needed to at least try to figure things out. Maybe my life wouldn't be pain free, symptom free, or easy, and maybe I wouldn't be able to do all the same things as before, but I could try new things and re-learn some old things.

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Learning anything old or new was a challenge! Every time I did something it was like learning it for the first time over and over again. It would get so frustrated to be given the same task each day, and not know even where to start, or have any memory of having done it before. I felt like I frustrated doctors, friends, and family members alike, and if they weren't frustrated with me, I was frustrated with me!

 

Others simply could not understand why I couldn't or "wouldn't" do simple activities that we used to do or even just meet up to chat. Some friends would talk circles around me, and it would feel like they were speaking a foreign language at times. It was so frustrating to not be able to understand what they were saying to me, but equally frustrating to not be able to share my struggles verbally. Brain injuries are difficult, because you may look fine, and appear to be the same person, but mentally, physically, and even emotionally so much had changed for me. I honestly didn't know who I was anymore.

 

I used to see myself as a roller coaster loving, adrenaline junky, adventure seeking, game fanatic, artist and creative mastermind, who was also a fun-loving wife, mom, granddaughter, daughter, sister, and friend. I also loved to do things like paint, color, craft, play with & teach kids with special needs, serve others, and now I was left with the, and I quote from a doctor who tested me, "an attention span of a 3 year old." And my problem solving, literacy, & math skills were not much better. Hence the reason (or one of the reasons) I was not released back to work to help teach the next generation. 

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When I say I had trouble with simple tasks I mean I couldn't count past 3, I had trouble matching shapes, colors, and numbers. This made game play for even the simplest of games impossible for me. Games like Uno or even Candy Land wouldn't have been something I could do. I couldn't color and stay in the lines without experiencing extreme head pain and vision issues. And cooking, don't even get me started! I am just now starting to understand which nob on the stove turns on which burner (I burn myself A LOT in the kitchen). Writing was even quite difficult at first, in fact I still have trouble with my spelling (thank God for spell check!) or remembering meanings or uses of some words. Just keeping my handwritten words on a line and without childish handwriting was a challenge at first.

 

Driving was a whole other beast, but one that I was most determined to tackle, because I wanted my freedom back. After many months, I was given the okay by my doctors to start small and try out parking lots & neighborhood drives. There were many, MANY failed attempts and moments that I am sure Jason tries to block from his memory, but eventually I did make progress. I made it from parking lots, to my neighborhood, to the grocery store down the street, and then I began driving Jason to and from work. I never, NEVER, not in a million years would have believed you if you would have told me that I would be driving across the country, alone, and with only my daughter in the car! TALK ABOUT MIRACULOUS! 

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Sometimes I think God takes away our "ordinary" every day normal life because he wants to create an EXTRAORDINARY MASTERPIECE OUT OF EACH OF US! I think of a house under construction...God is the builder, and He has the plans all drawn up, with a beautiful new design in mind, but first the house has to be gutted. Everything is cleared out. Maybe walls are torn down, fixtures ripped out, and floors are stripped bare, but he never leaves us this way. God always finishes what he starts. He comes in and He restores us, repairs us, and creates this beautiful new and inviting living space that anyone would be proud to show off and share with others. 

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I wish I could say that God is finished restoring me, but I know that's not true. That isn't true for any of us until the day that Jesus returns. I am reminded of the promise that God gives us that "In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." (John 16:33) Since the world is still broken, I think it is safe to say we will all still have problems, and we will all have challenges that we will have to overcome.

 

This injury has definitely not been my only obstacle and I'm sure it won't be the last. I have gone through abuse, trauma, and heartbreak like many couldn't imagine, but by the grace of God I am still here, and I still want to be. This injury was easy compared to the loss of our 3 babies, that died before ever taking their first breath. Why things like this in life happen, I am not sure, but I am confident in the fact that if we allow God to be at work in our life, he will take what Satan meant for bad, and He will turn it into good. I am living proof of that. The bad moments, the hard moments, and the painful moments make the good ones that much more special. 

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So is God finished with me, no, but God is in the process of restoring me, renewing my spirit, my sense of self-worth, and helping me see that my worth and my value comes simply from being his child, and not from what I do or accomplish. He has given me a fresh perspective on life, and He has helped me see just how valuable and precious time really is, and I want to make the most of the time He has given me.

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This is why I am so passionate about trying new adventures with my family and making memories while we can, and I love that Reising Up gives us a platform to inspire others to do the same. My hope is to encourage others to start living their own adventure, with the belief that no adventure is too big or too small. I truly believe the phrase, "Adventure is out there" is more than just a slogan to me, it is a reminder to all of us that life is just outside your front door, and all you have to do is take that first step. You never know where that first step is going to take you, and that is where adventure truly lives!

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So, who am I? I am first and foremost a child of God. A daughter of the King of Kings. I am a brand-new creation. The old has gone, and the new has come. I am a conqueror in Christ, and an overcomer. I am a grateful wife to a loving and caring husband that I adore. I am a mother of 3 angels in heaven, and one more angel that I get the pleasure of raising here on earth. I am a granddaughter, daughter, sister, and friend. I am grateful for all that have, all that I've been through, and I am so excited for the adventures to come!

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ARE YOU READY TO ADVENTURE WITH ME?

 

Check out some of my favorite vlogs so far on Reising Up below, and also come say hi to me over on Instagram:

Reising Up (@reising_up) • Instagram photos and videos

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Also, be sure to click the link below for resources for miscarriage, infertility, stillbirth, child loss, adoption, foster care, & special needs children. I created this website to have a central place for people to easily find others who are walking through a similar circumstance. Find everything from YouTube channels, books, Instagram accounts and more.

www.umbrellaofsupport.com

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